Anxiety and panic attacks have become a norm for me in these past couple of months. I somethings think it’s because I stopped drinking and have nothing to numb the noise in my head, but then I mostly think it’s because I was born into chaos and grew up in chaos, so I have always been in fight or flight mode. So now that although my life is calmer and a lot more structured, if there is any disruption at all I go back to that place, the one that takes me to feel as if I am in danger again.
Sometimes I feel as if I am trying to overachieve, other times I feel as if I don’t do enough but most of the times I feel like I am letting my friends and family down by not being as successful as I think they want me to be. Is it fair to put the blame on them? Absolutely not. At no point have they ever said to me
You don’t do enough
You aren’t enough
Why are you so lazy
Why aren’t you smarter
And yet, I put this burden that I am not enough for them and I need to be more. This feeling puts me right back to that place of anxiety. That place that makes me feel worried. I don’t sleep well, I don’t eat much and I feel weak.
I have a lot of dreams and hopes for my life and getting it done as soon as possible is what I hope to do, however, that’s not how it works.
If it doesn’t open, it means it’s not your door
Here I am guiding 9 women through to session #4 DETOX. trust and surrender. I’ve coached them to this point, taking them from setting a goal, learning how to notice triggers that create habits and now into surrender, my own lesson to learn. The anxiety and panic attacks I feel is because there are so many things that are not in my control. So many things I worry about, I am unsure about and have no control over and so what do I do
I panic. My heart beats fast. My hand shakes. I feel as if I am unstable and not sure if I want to go for a run or go to bed
TRUST and SURRENDER
If I am doing or have done the work. If I made my statement loud and clear of what I want and where I want to be, then why am I so panicked. Why am I not able to eat well, sleep well, or commit to doing what I said I was going to do? The answer is in this session of Detox. I am not trusting that the universe has my back. I am not believing that it will happen how it should when it should and most important I am not trusting that I have done all I needed to do to get to where I want to be.
There is no doubt when I practice trust and surrender that I feel an immediate peaceful state of mind. I am able to receive messages that guide me to do what I need to do without feeling anxious about it. I sleep better and focus my energy on what I have rather than what I want. There is no way that we are meant to feel as if we are not enough. We were either taught that and took on to believe it was true or we put the burden on ourselves because our faith in our own intuition isn’t strong.
We all have intuition, that gut feeling you get when something doesn’t feel right. Or that thought that pops into our head telling us what we need to do. Intuition is real, that gut feeling is real, but what isn’t real is the anxiety, the worries, and the panic attacks. Those are reminders that you are not trusting the journey. You are not believing you are worth more, you deserve a good life and that as long as you are showing up and creating those rituals that help you stay grounded, you will be ok. It will be all good. And you will manifest the things you want.
If you want to learn more about manifesting your healthiest life ever, set up a free coaching call with absolutely no obligation. I am here to listen, to guide, support and educate. There is no sales pitch, just an intention.